Shattered
by KouenTaisa
Summary: They had argued the night before she died. Twilight spoilers.


**Title:** Shattered  
**Author:** KouenTaisa [on ] Chedders  
**Rating:** K+  
**Fandom:** NCIS  
**Pairing:** Gibbs/Kate, slight Gibbs/Abby  
**Status:** Finished  
**Category:** Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Angst  
**Spoilers: **Twilight  
**Summary:** They had argued the night before she died.  
**A/N: **This just popped into my head and since I'm having some trouble with _Beside You, _I decided that it couldn't hurt to write something else.

_And I've lost who I am, and I can't understand. _  
_Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love, _  
_without, love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on_. -** Trading Yesterday: Shattered**

They had argued the night before she died.

_"Why can't you just say it, Gibbs?"_

_"What do you want me to say?"_

_"Say that you love me, that you care for me! Just- say something!"_

_"I can't do that."_

_"Why am I not surprised?"_

She had slammed the door when she left, and even in his memory, it sounded loud and hollow. Arguments between them were common. She didn't back down easily and he admired that. It was part of the reason they worked so well, but it was also the reason they did argue more than normal. He had planned on telling her that he cared for her, but that it wasn't love. Not yet.

Now, it never would be.

The knife in his chest, however, was the fact that she had died because of him. Protecting him. Being on that rooftop had been the end of her life and he would forever remember the ghost of a smile on her face before she was killed. Her death had been hard on them all. Tony blamed himself and McGee was upset, but it was the woman upstairs in his bed that he worried about.

He had been in a relationship with Kate.

Abby had been her best friend, and his girl had a way of feeling things so much more than the others. The thought caused him to hurt, but he had to keep his distance for the time being. He didn't want to worry Abby with his mood swings, even though they had been worse since that day on the rooftop barely a week ago.

The sound of someone on the stairs caused him to turn, his eyes landing upon pale figure of one Abigail Sciuto.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked, moving away from his desk without a second thought. The bourbon and the memories could wait, because he had learned at least one thing from all of this heartache.

Spend the time you had with those you love, because you never know when it's going to be the last time you see them.

Meeting her at the top of the stairs, Gibbs wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace. Abby hugged him back, burying her face against his neck.

"Love you, Gibbs." she mumbled softly. She had told him that plenty of times. Just like she told the others that she loved them, but this time he knew it was different, and he accepted it for what it was.

"Love you too, Abs." he whispered softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. Leading her silently back to his bed, all he could think about was the last thing he remembered saying to Kate.

_"I can't do that."_

Lying down beside his girl, he pulled her close to his chest, needing to know that she was alive. The warmth of her body soothed the ache of his and he closed his eyes, feeling exhaustion pull at him.

"Gibbs?"

"Yeah, Abs?"

"… she knows, Gibbs."

Taking a deep breath, he kissed the back of Abby's neck, his only acknowledgment to her statement before she fell asleep and left him with his thoughts.

They had argued the night before she died, but the smile she had directed at him on the rooftop would always be his favorite, because of what it told him.

Kate had known that he cared, and that smile had told him.

For that reason, it would also be the cause of many sleepless nights because of what it signified. A single shot on the rooftop that had broken the lives of so many.

But it was that smile that would be his undoing.

Even though it was shattered in the aftermath of her death, he was positive that one day he would be able to put all of the pieces back together, if only to see her smile again.


End file.
